top of page
  • Writer's pictureDr. Speshal Walker Gautier a.k.a. Dr. Spesh

Sis, Gift yourself with unapologetic self-love this season.

Last week, we talked about setting boundaries and protecting your peace during the holiday season. Now let’s talk about the greatest gift you can give yourself during the holidays and beyond... Learn to love yourself unapologetically, Sis.

Whether you are looking for love or already in love, loving, and choosing yourself is key. Wherever you are in your journey toward having the kind of relationships you want, remember that your relationship with yourself is foundational. Sometimes we say we love ourselves yet fail to treat ourselves with kindness and compassion. Sometimes we say we love ourselves but forget to identify and prioritize our needs OR fall into the trap of justifying them to others. This can be common for women who are socialized to take up less space and accommodate others. Too often, Black women have put entire families and communities on their backs and devoted themselves to serving others at the expense of their own needs.

So, as you wrap gifts or send holiday wishes and love to others, take pause, Sis. Ask the question, what am I gifting myself? Am I gifting myself with the love that I need and deserve? If the answer is no, what is getting in the way? Perhaps it’s feeling obligated to others, perhaps it’s taking on too much in your personal and/or professional life. Maybe it’s the guilt that comes up with setting boundaries for yourself. Remind yourself that despite the discomfort that may arise from making the choice to prioritize yourself, you are entitled to do so. There is no need to apologize or justify your decision to love yourself in this way.

Prioritizing your needs and setting healthy boundaries are acts of self-love and I encourage you to start practicing these actions regularly. Give yourself this gift, Sis. In time you will improve your relationship with yourself AND others by remembering to love yourself in this way. There is no better time to send this loving reminder than the season of giving.

*Dr. Spesh is an Atlanta based Clinical Psychologist, blogger, and diversity consultant.*

Heads up, Sis! We will be on a holiday break and will return in the New Year. What topics do you want to hear about in the Sis Blog Series next year? Send your topic requests, thoughts, and/or questions to

Follow me @Dr.Spesh on Instagram @sisbydrspesh on Facebook

Subscribe for all the latest including weekly love letters.

65 views0 comments


Post: Blog2_Post
bottom of page